My Weight Loss Musings

*Monday morning, I woke up and instead of going right into my gratitude meditation as I normally do (I find that meditating on being grateful is a FANTASTIC way to start my day), I found myself thinking about losing weight.

Back in September of 2007, my scale hit a scary 205 pounds. I have weighed as much as 260 in the past, but always longed to see the 160 of my teenaged years. And it bears meantioning that I'm 5'10" tall. I joined Curves (a circuit training gym for women) and totally changed the way myself and my family eat and between September 2007 and May 2008, I managed to take off 33 pounds, leaving me at 167 pounds. My mini men got out of school for the summer and I couldn't go to the gym so I walked and jogged daily and sometimes less and managed to maintain my weight loss without much effort. I did go from 167 up to 170/172 but I didn't think much of it. I spent the summer pretty happy with my body and my weight. I got some new clothes and felt really good... health wise AND about myself. I'd originally set my goal at 160, but I was in no hurry.

*Back to Monday morning. There I lay, thinking about losing weight. And I thought... that's odd... maybe it's time to actively go for that goal again...maybe this spontaneous thought pattern is a sign. I got out of bed and went about my day but the weight loss thoughts kept returning on and off. Having not been on my laptop in what seemed like forever, I decided to go read the blogs that I usually follow. On the blog, "My Gratitude Journal", the most recent post was entitled Love Your Body - No Matter What! Of course it was about her current weight loss and goals. (Singin *Sign, sign, everywhere a sign.)

Later, when my boys came home, my 8 years old says, "I'm gunna go outside and rake some leaves to celebrate the first day of fall!!"

"The first day of fall? Is it??" I asked.
"Yeah" he said, "We talked about it in school today."

Wow... I wake up thinking about losing weight out of nowhere... then there's blog posts on the topic and now I find out it's the first day of fall... you know... the season when mother nature shakes off all the excess. Boy... it's really lookin' like a sign to me now. I get up and walk across the room to look at this day on the calendar and see that this day is ALSO the first day of the moon's 3rd phase. On the day marking the 3rd seasonal quarter (fall) nature also marks the 3rd lunar quarter. And it's a Monday. Who doesn't love starting a new habit on the first day of the week. It's a fresh start.

*So, I wrote down my morning weight from that morning... 171 LBs... and I've decided that I'm going to lose 11 pounds by October 22, 2008. One month. I can SO do this!! My friend K has been wanting to conquer her last 10 pounds too, so we've decided to do it together. She dragged me 4 1/2 miles down the road on foot the other day. Boy can that girl haul ass! We both love walking and it gives us time to gab, so it ends up being a really fun time.

I'm going to put my little weight loss icon back on my vision board. Mondays will be my weekly weigh day. I am so psyched about the idea of weighing 160 pounds again. That's what it takes though... a passion about what you want. I'm so happy about this, there's no way I can fail! I might have to steal Jeannette Maw's mantra/affermation about losing weight while she sleeps.

*Ya know... this just occured to me. I experienced the most life changing parts of my spiritual journey during the time of my weight loss, as I really learned to love and respect my body. Lately, like the last 2 weeks, I've been feeling a little.... stalled. I've had my mind on other things and was spending time getting to know K, but I was REALLY on a roll for a while and I feel like I'm stuck and I need to step in a direction other than where I am now. So maybe I'm being pulled back into my weight loss as an avenue for me to find my way. Maybe God knows it worked and got through to me the first time.... a second go-round might be just what I need. Boy, writing is almost like meditation sometimes. I love it. Even if all that didn't make much sense to you, that up there is JUST what I needed. LOL

Anyway, that's where I am right now. Learning to love my body, regardless of it's shape, size, or weight is where I found my connection to God. Loving yourself is the hardest thing in the world for so many people but it's where you will find peace, and exercise and weight loss was the path that lead me there. I guess I'm off to further seek my truth by releaving my form of these 11 pounds.

I hope your path is leading you in a direction that feels good. If it's not.... change your path. A different direction is never more than 1 step away!

Peace & Love,
El